Thursday, January 20, 2011

Pity Party…table for one…

So this month I’ve hardly been able to stand my own company. After being felled by severe stomach pains on Halloween and undergoing an endoscopy (that landed me in the ER with a bad reaction to the anesthesia) and an ultrasound on my gallbladder, I’ve been wallowing in self-pity. Like big-time major wallowing.

My gallbladder is at the ‘upper range of normal,’ which means…nothing. In addition, to step up my exercise routine I recently worked out on weight machines and ended up at the eye doctor with more aging eye ‘issues.’ Can you say fireworks ‘exploding’ in my eye? Then there’s my late grandmother’s foot…reincarnated on me….spooky.

For the past year, I’ve endeavored to make a lifestyle change by ramping up the exercise and eschewing dieting in favor of the aforementioned change.

But hadn’t quite counted on the aging process ‘processing.’ Silly me. And even as I whine incessantly, I know I have nothing to complain about. Seriously. Don’t even want to travel down that road of friends who’ve gone way too soon. That would necessitate finding a new box of tissues for my office.

Just this morning I heard an upbeat story about an old friend’s health scare and a sad, sad story about another old friend. Makes my ‘problems’ seem like a hangnail.

With me, it’s always about the subtext. Why did I think getting older would elude me? I vividly recall my mom telling me at a Christmas Eve service when she was about 50 that she still felt 25 on the inside. Some days I feel 15…the age of my youngest son. Other days I feel…old.

And very happy to be alive to feel old.

Cancel the table for one.

2 comments:

  1. I'm there with you girlfriend and I'm way older than you at 65 last June 8.
    It's not fun but when I think of the alternative it becomes "more fun."
    SOme days my hips and knees ache. When did that happen? It's new yet seems to be here to stay awhile.
    Listen to my stomach woes. Last spring I thought I was having a pancreas attack as I'd had them before. Dr. went down and put a stent into pancreas. Still sick weeks, months later.
    X ray to make sure the pancreas stent was gone, showed, guess what - a kidney stone. Two days later an attack sent me to dr. who did an emergency stent in kidney to allow stone to dislodge itself. Much sickness followed along with nausea. AND THEN I GOT BETTER. Miraculous. AFter months of feeling lousey, I'm better.
    So, take heart you will be well again. And from one who had her gall bladder out years ago due to stones, it can make you pretty sick.
    This too shall pass. And on many days, I feel 17.
    Just not today.
    Blessings and here's to getting together at the WV conference. Stomach was why I didn't make it last year.
    B

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know what you mean. Seems like this past year my age has caught up with me. I still think of myself as young in mind and heart, but my body disagrees. I guess we all need to count our blessings. . . things could be worse.I, too, am very happy to be old and alive.

    ReplyDelete